Fluttering Butterflies or Assuring Comfort – The Time We Were Not in Love

Happy Friday! The sun is shining oh so brightly!

Winter Fall is almost (or already) here and before you know it the falling leaves will also bring a new season to your summer flings: hook-ups, break-ups, getting back together, closures, and all that colours summer usually filled with. It’s one more reason for me to ponder upon relationships and the excitement that comes with it. Observing Ha Ji Won’s *ehem* childish acting/character made me think that “The Time We Were Not in Love” a.k.a  “너를 사랑한 시간 (the time I have loved you, 7000 days)” simply divides the pie or which-one-do-you-prefer-buzzfeed-lists-style relationships into two: Fluttering Butterflies or Assuring Comfort. But oh boy, this turned out to be harder to ponder upon/write/review.

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Credit to: SBS

While I was watching this drama, I grew to detest Oh Ha-Na’s flimsiness and the fact that Won is hurting as he keeps his feelings to himself *aah so sad ㅠ.ㅠ*. Oh Ha-Na needs to invest her heart on the one *see my smart pun one a.k.a won a.k.a hana, no? NO??* and not the bad pianist who could not stand on his own feet and hurt her so bad but decided to reappear and act as if he’s all that almighty and could win her heart again in a heartbeat. Dang you Oh Ha-Na! STOP ACTING LIKE A LG *little girl* YOU’RE A FREAKING STRONG CAREER WOMAN – that, my friends, was my initial reaction.

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Credit to: SBS

Choi Won and Oh Ha-Na have been in love best friends for 20 years. Somewhat built up to be like an assuring comfort the best mattress in the market could provide. The kind of romance of everyone is to have a close relationship with someone who understands you. Someone who is, or decide to be, on the same wavelength with you. Sometimes words are not needed, they just know what you need; responding and reacting with you in ways that almost like reflects. Like those pop song lyrics “lucky I’m in love with my best friend”.

Being familiar.

Like a habit.

Those familiar comforts, are they enough to declare on a relationship? Taking Won’s words, breaking out of the friendship cycle is also a difficult thing:

“It feels like I have finally pulled out the tooth that has been causing me pain. But it does not feel that good”.

It could leave you with a happy ending or it would make you end up in an awkward situation with your best friend. Is it worth the try? Knowing that if you wouldn’t, you will have to share “our secrets and hiding place” with someone else (ouch).

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Credit to: SBS

I’m still finding Oh Ha-Na’s saying about her relationship with Cha Seo-Hoo *I will update it once I found the needle in the hay stack*. Well, at least it says something along this line: It’s like fluttering butterflies with a different kind of familiarity. I began to question Oh Ha-Na as soon as soon as she showed that she was trying to rekindle those flickering emotions brought back from the past. I mean, why would one want to go back with an ex who hurt him/her in the past? Is not once enough?

Only after a while (and after the last episode aired for weeks), could I understand Oh Ha-Na + Cha Seo-Hoo. Letting someone in to your life is one thing and letting them go is another thing. Sometimes you just have that greed for things to work out just right, despite of things that has gone wrong. Somewhat like hanging into just few tiny peebles of good things for your reasons to let them stay.

If both of you have changed for the better, then you can continue to tango. But as long as the status quo still reign *read: you still have the same pattern and same view of things while maintaining the same attitude, etc.*, then, history will repeat itself and you will be hurt with the same dagger that stab you before. Same pain, same scenario, but different times, deeper cut.

You can’t preserve something just because it was beautiful. If it’s worth fighting for, then you got to have to make some good sacrifices – leaving the old – to jump into the wavelength where both individuals can grow and actually be together.

너를 사랑한 시간.E05.150711.HDTV.H264.720p-WITH.mp4_20150712_151145.779
Credit to: SBS

K-Drama fans, I guess I was wrong!

Oh Ha-Na was not being flimsy. She was being honest to herself, and that may be shown as being vulnerable.  Maybe butterflies could be too fragile, but everyone deserves a second chance. Or comfy cotton like clouds may cause bedsores, but who knows if breaking out your comfort zone is what you actually need. Being strong does not mean hiding all your feelings nor does looking what is in front of you would give you the answer. And your true “THE one” is someone who can make you be true-er *and better* version of yourself each time you get closer with that person.  I guess that’s all what matters the most.

Do you have your own Choi Won or Cha Seo-Hoo. How did you make a closure or what made you decide to stick with that person? I hope every Oh Ha-Nas, Choi-Wons, and Cha Seo-Hoos out there will be given courage respect for your own feelings and take that one step towards happiness!

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One thought on “Fluttering Butterflies or Assuring Comfort – The Time We Were Not in Love

  1. Pingback: The beautiful Friendzoned Song – Jung Seung Hwan – @edreaMJ

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